Author: Peter Lane

(aka: Why ChatGPT Can’t Replace the Parish Secretary — Yet)

I recently helped someone use AI to draft a pastoral care roster.

It confidently produced a six-week schedule — nicely formatted, evenly distributed, and even colour-coded.  A small miracle, except for one problem: it assigned duties to three people who’d moved away, one who’d passed away, and one who had, in no uncertain terms, declared themselves done with morning tea forever — and said so loudly enough that even the flower roster flinched.

That’s the problem with clever automation: it’s fast, it’s convincing… and it doesn’t actually know your people.

🤖 “Yes, and here are three ways to make your bad idea better.”

We like the idea that technology will take boring tasks off our plate. And to be fair, it often can. But AI doesn’t say, “Are you sure that’s wise?” If anything, it says, “Yes — and here are three ways to make your bad idea even shinier!”

I’ve had this same tool write notices, suggest announcements, and summarise minutes from meetings I wasn’t in.  Which, as it turns out, is still slightly better than most people manage after actually attending.  But it also generates hymns that rhyme “Holy Ghost” with “vegemite toast,” and thinks the Lay Preachers’ Network meets monthly in Rotorua, led by someone called Cheryl.  So we’re not quite ready to hand over the mailing list.

🧠 What AI can do well

There’s real potential in using AI as a support tool. It’s excellent at:

• Summarising minutes (though more on that in a moment)
• Rewording notices in plain English
• Writing templated blurbs for events
• Suggesting topics or structures for sermons, emails, or posters
• Helping roster-wranglers match names to roles (if you feed it a correct list!)

Used well, it’s like having a patient, mildly robotic intern who never sleeps and doesn’t complain about your formatting choices.

✋ What AI can’t do (yet)

It can’t remember who swapped with who last Easter. It doesn’t know that Margaret never says yes until Dawn does.  It doesn’t see the half-raised eyebrow in a committee meeting that actually means “not now.”

AI can’t exercise discretion. It doesn’t sense relational dynamics or know when to tread carefully.  It doesn’t even blink when your most pastoral person gets assigned to prune the hedge.

And no matter how confidently it generates a suggestion, it still doesn’t know anything.  It just guesses what would look plausible based on the internet and a frankly suspicious number of LinkedIn posts.

🙃 “The minute secretary is redundant now, apparently.”

This might sound like a punchline, but it’s something I actually heard recently — from a real, human minute secretary, no less.  AI tools like Otter.ai and Fathom are now quietly turning up in Zoom meetings, transcribing conversations with eerie fluency and very little oversight.

Some IT teams are reportedly having quiet panic attacks about this trend — not least because many of these tools store data offshore, with no real guarantees about privacy or data retention.  “Free” transcription comes with hidden costs, and they’re not always paid in dollars.

Let’s be honest: we didn’t all sign up for this.  But the tools are here — and some are genuinely helpful.

⚖️ Use it? Sure. But don’t give it keys to the vestry.

I’m not anti-AI.  In fact, I’ve seen it do great things — like help someone draft a sermon outline when they were under time pressure and stuck for a start.  (Philip Garside wrote about his own experience with AI sermons: AI-assisted sermon.)

But the golden rule is this: treat it like a tool, not a secretary.  Please and thank you are optional — but double-checking is not.

If it saves you time, excellent.  If it gives you ideas, fantastic.  But it won’t notice who’s tired.  It won’t ring someone who missed the meeting and quietly ask if they’re okay.  And it certainly won’t follow up when you forget to.

📬 Got AI stories from your church?

At d|c|t (the Diaconate of Church Technologists), we’re collecting stories — both the successes and the “well, it seemed like a good idea at the time…” moments.  If you’ve experimented with AI tools in your church (for admin, worship, planning, or pure curiosity), we’d love to hear from you.  Your examples will help shape a practical, grounded Church + AI resource we’ll be releasing later this year. You can contact us through dct.org.nz/church-ai.  We’re here to help churches navigate the digital world with a bit of wisdom, a bit of humour, and only as much automation as necessary.

Peter Lane is Principal Consultant at System Design & Communication Services and has over 30 years of experience with Technology systems.  We invite your questions, suggestions and ideas for articles.  These can be submitted either through the editor or by email to dct@dct.org.nz.  We also operate a website focused on building a community of people interested in improving how we use technology in churches, located at dct.org.nz.